Do over

I need a fresh start, a do-over. I had high hopes for landing here in the Bay Area and building a new life. I wanted a life that was based on positivity and taking good care of my body and mind. I wanted to let go of the bad attitudes and habits that had made me feel so down about my life in Chicago.

Shortly after settling in here, I felt like I was on the right track. I was involving myself in active social events like hiking and making friends. I was finding joy in life every day and loving my new town.

Then negative stuff started to intrude. I had a series of health setbacks (diverticulitis #1#2, #3, and #4; hormonal imbalances; a rare eye disease; and, a renegade ovarian cyst). My work changed and I had a whole new team/boss with a different culture to learn. I tried dating, and while I had some good experiences in the early days, after spending more time with each person I realized there were issues that made a relationship unworkable. I let all of this stuff drag me down again and my mood switched from mostly positive to negative.

So I’m declaring a fresh start now. I put myself through two surgeries in the past year because they were necessary to me regaining my health. They are done and I’ve got another month to rest and recover. In that time frame I will also start building better habits for myself. I will get back into meditating and studying mindfulness. I’ll allow myself to dream and free associate about my work and professional life. I may look for a local therapist. I’ll look for more ways to continue building my social network. Dating will not be something I actively seek to do, and I’m not sure what I’d do if I met someone socially that interested me. I guess I’ll deal with it if/when I need to.

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6 thoughts on “Do over

  1. This was such an uplifting and positive post! It gave me a lift just to read it. I am convinced that you can accomplish anything you set your mind to doing, and I have no doubt that your future will be brighter. You are a determined and capable woman, and you have already accomplished so much! I hope you are healing comfortably, and best wishes to you from Chicago. Go Cubs!!

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  2. P.S.

    Did I ever tell you how I found your blog?  About 10 years ago my husband and I thought about raising chickens in our yard.  We live in Portage Park and have a very long lot — plenty of room for a coop.

    I researched “Raising chickens in Chicago”  and came upon your blog.  I read the entire blog over a few days.  You are such a good writer, and you were so interesting with your chickens and your knittting.  And I learned, as I told my husband, he and I were far too lazy to keep chickens healthy and safe.  You put a lot of work into those chickens, that’s for sure!

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    • Thanks for reminding me of this! I love reading your comments because they are always so positive, yet I’ve wondered how I picked you up as a reader. I keep meaning to update my page about my chickens, but continue to put it off. There are still quite a few hits to that page and the information is still valid.

      You certainly could raise chickens, though. I didn’t mean to make it sound hard. If you get a safe, solid coop they are easier to care for than a cat. The tough part is planning what to do with them if they do get ill, die, or stop laying.

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