Every time you go away…

My support network is a bit diminished right now. Adrienne left for Iona last night and won’t be back for 2 1/2 weeks. Eek!

She needs this break, though, and Iona for her is like Big Sur or northern New Mexico is for me: the place you go when you want to lift your heart. The lucky among us have found such places and get the chance to visit them often enough.

We had a nice chat the night before she left. A doesn’t agree to me thinking of  “Abandon hope” as a guiding principle. I guess a better way to explain it is “Stop yearning.” Every time I feel myself starting to float away into a fantasy land of my own making, this guiding principle brings me back to the real world. I do like to think of it as “abandon hope” because that’s so succinct, but if it sounds too raw that way, then it’s OK to think of it as “Stop drifting off into a fantasy life and thinking about…stuff…all the time.”

I’ve had to do that more than a few times over the past several days, but I’m doing OK. I still feel lonely quite a bit, but I think that’s normal. Yesterday I did some searching online and found a meditation center here in Chicago that I think I may visit. They have open meditation sessions on Sunday mornings, so I’m thinking of working that into my schedule one weekend.

Not this weekend, though. This weekend I’m all set to have a rollicking good time with Misty. She’s in transit now from Indiana and we’re meeting up in the Loop to kick off a girls weekend. I scored some cheap tickets to the Goodman Theatre’s Animal Crackers for tonight so we’ll grab a quick bite, enjoy this highly acclaimed show, and then head back to the house. We may hit a haunted house tomorrow night; we’re being sort of flexible with our plans, so we’ll see.

Next weekend is Halloween and I’ve been invited to a party at my sister’s house, but I think I’m going to a Meet Up function with the usual ladies (Rachael, Jamie, Chris, etc.) instead. Then it’s November. Wow, the seasons are disappearing rapidly, aren’t they?

I’d love to take another short trip before Christmas, but I’m not sure if it’s possible or where would be good to go. I have some park hopper passes for Disney World in Orlando, but that’s not the kind of trip I’d like to do on my own.

Then again, maybe all this restlessness is yet another manifestation of my loneliness and I should just stay put and continue to work on it…

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